I have had a few friends ask how the kiddos are doing with this upheaval in their lives. I must say that the foundation that Eric built for our family has endured this "earthquake" and has made us stronger. I have seen our kids come together and rally behind one another. There have been many tears and yet many hugs.
How about a run down on each child?
Boo was very, very close to her daddy. She, of course, has had many more years with him and the bond was strong. She has shed many tears and yet has really shown how strong she is in Christ. She believes and trust God's promises. She is the one that is most attentive to me. She will come up and hold my hand when Eric use to. She is quite a comfort to me and I think that in this way we are sharing our grief together. I believe that she will struggle when we go on our first trip away or when we go do something that would have daddy written all over it. But, she will come and squeeze my hand and we will struggle through it together.
Goose is being very brave right now. I don't think it has really hit him yet. I gave all the children writing tablets and encouraged them to write their memories, letters to Eric, and draw pictures of their feelings. I have not seen what Goose has written but I am sure this will be the most profitable way for him to grieve. He is a bit like me...he would rather grieve in private and not in front of a whole group of people. He has also taken up running with our Pastor and his kids. Running is a great way to relieve your body of stress.
Miss M was hit hard today. She moped around and was very teary. She is very accepting of hugs and is very cuddly right now...this is not her normal self as many of my friends would attest to. She is also sleeping a lot. I reminded her of her writing tablet and encouraged her to get her thoughts down on paper since she is a wonderful writer.
Daisy is her joyful self. She is the one I have been most concerned about because she saw Eric collapse. Her writing tablet is a quarter of the way full of pictures of her and her daddy. She wrote out what happened that Friday and has some other sweet things written in there about her daddy. She is the most like his personality which was much less emotional. I also have some workbooks about death that we received at the hospital which we will be going through. Thankfully, our dear missionary friend from Canada browsed through them and let me know of anything that went against what we believe.
Lil' Cowboy has cried many tears over the past few weeks. By the way, today is exactly two weeks since Eric's passing into Glory. Anyway, Lil' Cowboy has given us some concern because of a couple of things he has said. He asked our next door neighbor if he could call him dad now. This would be cute if it was a child that was not adopted but not so cute when you are trying to bond to an adopted child. We settled on uncle instead of dad. He also told Daisy that he was not her brother but rather her step-brother...he doesn't even know what a step-brother is but he does know that it means something different than a brother. He also told us that he was not a Davis. I have had some long talks with him and am so grateful that he has an older brother to look up to. I am sure it will be all right...we continue to draw him into our family and hope he accepts us.
Brown Sugar is not oblivious to what is going on around her. She senses something is different. Nana and Papa are here, friends and family are pouring in and out the door daily, and daddy has not come home. I continue to tell her that daddy loves her and that he is living with Jesus. She has also started to act up a bit more so I am having to really be consistant even when I am exhausted from crying. It is a trying time and yet I know that consistantly disciplining and nurturing her will mean many sweet year ahead.
Such a long post....sorry about that. I hope this answers some questions on how the kids are doing. The National Cemetary is giving a national burial for Eric this Friday. On the same day I plan to present the children with a book to cherish. For the girls I bought Cinderella: The Love of a Daddy and His Princess by Steven Curtis Chapman. For Nate I am buying Grandpa's Box: Retelling the Biblical Story of Redemption by Starr Meade because he is now taking on the duties of leading us in family worship. And, for Lil' Cowboy I bought My ABC Bible Verses by Susan Hunt.