Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Three Months

Today is April 29th. On this date three months ago I said good-bye to my beloved. So, as you can imagine today was a very emotional one. There were some bright spots in the day though -like having lunch with a friend and picking up Goose at the airport.

Because of an already planned trip to Central Oregon we chose to keep driving north after picking up Goose. It seemed logical rather than driving the hour and a half home south to get back on the road the next day to head north again. So, I am writing to you from a hotel room. I have always loved adventures and this one will hopefully turn out to be a great one. To add to the adventure we decided to take our chances and just find a hotel (this was not that hard since I have stayed in this Northern town before). After booking a room, Boo and I walked over to Marie Callenders and picked up a German Chocolate Pie. This has become a tradition for the kids and I...eating a pie out of the pie tin while sitting in a hotel on vacation. It somehow tastes better and usually there is some left over for breakfast!

I am headed north to attend my brother's wedding. Like last weekend this weekend will be a tough one. All of my mom's side of the family live in Central Oregon (it is where I spent most of my growing up years) and so I have plenty of visits to make and plenty of tears to cry this weekend. Everyone in my family loved Eric.

For many reasons this wedding is not going to be an easy one to attend. First off the wedding is at 6:30am. Ugh! I haven't seem that time in the morning for quite a long time. It is also being held outside which, in May means it will be very, very cold. But, most of all this is hard because it is my brother's third marriage. I hope that the third time is a charm. It is ironic that I was married for twenty years and now I am not married but my sister and brother are and they had not been until just recently. As I told my sister last night, I am very happy for them and I am hopeful that I will be married again soon. But, until then I have to face the facts that I am a widow with six children and that changes more than just the dynamics of my own family. It changes my relationships with everyone in my family.

On a day like today I am very grateful for the covering and love of my Kinsman-Redeemer. He truly satisfies. So, even though I struggle through these tough moments I know I am loved. I know that I am taken care of. I know that I am called.

I was talking to L this afternoon and I commented on how I had made it through the last three months. Her words were so encouraging "You're doing much more than just making it". K called to remind me that she and her husband still KNOW that I can do this. And, I received a card from J letting me know she is praying for me even while on the other side of the states visiting family. It is because of my friends, my church family, my family, and my friends here out in blog world that I am feeling so encouraged. But, it is because of God's gift of perseverance (of the saints) and His faithfulness that I am walking (not standing still) through this valley.



Flying ~O~ Family said...

Dear Heather, As a person who sees you in this trial I have to agree you are doing more than just making it. You are going forth and continuing relationships, making memories for the children and designing a new life. It is not the life you chose or planned on... but as I watch your humility and faith through this valley my own faith is stretched. Your honesty and willingness to share through this blog continues to let us know how to pray for you and the kids. It gives me tremendous PERSPECTIVE as I walk through the days of my own life. We miss Eric greatly, there was a gift he had of loving people, making fast and instant friends, feeling comfortable in almost every situation. We firsthand have been on the recieveing end of so much help. Eric was not acting alone and I see how you made so much of the Davis family hospitality possible. Just last week as I wanted to do something for you and Boo you shoed up at my door with a little bit of hospitality. Yes my dear friend, you are more than making it and you will make it with the Lord at your side. I'm sure you never imagined that becoming a widow would minister to others, but it does.
You are loved

Laurie said...


I will be praying for you as you attend the wedding (who gets married this early ever?). Praying for your heart as you will be seeing so many who loved your sweetheart Eric. You carry on his love and memory by doing this and I pray you are blessed ten fold. We live down here in So. Ca. halfway between L.A. and San Diego and just drove up to Northern Ca. two weeks ago. It is such a beautiful drive through the redwoods and nature. I hope your trip is peaceful and full of good memories. Praying for you extra on this 3 month milestone. You are doing a tremendous job of going forward with the Lords help.
You are a huge blessing to your kids. Oh, and German Chocolate pie is absolutely the best, especially right out of the pan with no boundaries!!!:) May you be flooded with love this weekend.

Love, Laurie in So. Ca.

Annee said...

I have been praying for you these last three months. May you feel the presence of the great Comforter this week-end. I am not sure where you are going in central OR but if you are in the neighborhood of Salem and need a break feel free to track me down.
Annee Goodrich
AoH mom to Philip and Elisabeth (Liberian) and Caleb and Noah

Anonymous said...

Still praying for you and growing in my faith as I watch you go through this season...you are as I have said before leaving quite a legacy of faith.

I have felt led for a while now to send you a couple of links to ladies blogs who are widows as well and they are 1 to 2 years from the day they lost their beloved husbands, but I always talk myself out of sending you the links and then I keep getting that nudge to just pass them on to you, so I will wait no more...I shall obey that nudge :o) :o) :o)



Because of Christ,

flowerpot said...


I am praying for God's blessings on you as you walk through all these firsts and through times that you would have enjoyed with Eric. I know that no day is wasted and you are clinging to our Father. "The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe" Pv 18:10
Psalm 63:7
"Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings."
prayers & blessings,

CristyLynn said...

Ok, I just have to say, 6:30am! Not to sound rude, but are they crazy! :)
Now that that's out of my system, I wanted to say that we will be praying for you and your kids this weekend in special ways. I know that God will continue to be your strength.

Tim said...


Glad to hear of your trip to Oregon!

If your family gets over to SW Oregon sometime, you are welcome to stay over here in Grants Pass as we have a number of bedrooms and a guest house on our 8 acres.

We homeschooled out 6 children both here and in Japan. Kevin heads up Christian Home Educators of Colorado as well as pastoring Reformation Church of Castle Rock.

Son Tim [I'm using his blog ID] and his wife in Sweet Home, OR have recently adopted a Korean boy and girl.

We have friends in Klamath Falls who are seeking to adopt from Africa who would probably like to talk to you.

Ralph Swanson

RachelMac said...

Wow, I can hardly believe it has been three months already. We continue to pray for you and your family often.
The McCall Family in Idaho

Jean said...


We were so glad you made it up last weekend. I wish I could have been a tad more attentive to your needs, but perhaps that was for the best.

You continue to amaze me. I am so glad to once again hear your gorgeous voice worshiping our Heavenly Father.

I hope you enjoy the Oregon adventure. I'm sure God's creation will be gorgeous, even early in the morning!

Looking forward to the next adventure...

Love & Blessings, Jean

godlover said...

Thinking of you and praying for God's protection for you on your trip north. I pray that He will keep you safe until you return home. Also praying for you, Heather, as this third month milestone passes. Be assured the Lord will not leave you in widowhood a moment longer than necessary.

Why in the world would anyone get married that early, especially outdoors! You have to tell us the reason when you blog again.

The pie sounds wonderful.

Calaveras County CA

Martha A. said...

That is neat you were able to do some decorating! I miss seeing your posts on PW and have been thinking and praying for you!

felmleyfam said...


Stacy McDonald said...


Please know we are still praying and thinking of you often. Can't wait to see you in a few weeks! We love you!

felmleyfam said...

never heard the part in the song cry out to Jesus about the widow who is lonely. what a blessing that music ministers to your soul and those who sing bless you and nuture you without even knowing it. called your phone. praying for you as you "cry out to Jesus." Continue on good momma!
John 15:1 I am the true vine, and my Father is the husbandman.
Jhn 15:2 Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every [branch] that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit.

What a loving father, even training you in times of grief as you also train your children (and brown sugar especially). this is love, not that we loved God but that HE loved us! Precious promises we have; cling to them, and I know you are!

Valerie said...


I have thought of you many times throughout the past days. Just praying for you and the kids as you travel and spend time with your family (prayed you made it through that early wedding). In church we sang the Amazing Grace version that was at Eric's funeral and I tear up everytime it plays. It makes me miss him and brings such sadness in my heart for you and the kids.

You know it is interesting as I want to do something for you, I feel a heaviness when I feel as if I am not helping in some way and yet I realize that praying is so important and why does it feel as if one isn't doing much when they are only praying. I guess maybe that shows my lack of faith in prayer. Of course God calls us to action and many have definately helped you in so many needed and practical ways. As a dear friend I am so grateful you have such a wonderful church body and am truly grateful for them as at this season with the bit of distance and my little ones I feel a bit helpless but will continue to pray. Hopefully this summer we can all hang out and create some new memories together.

love you all bunches!