Saturday, November 22, 2008

More Than a Sentiment

These words are on the wall next to my bed. I wake up to it every morning when I turn off my alarm. It is more than a sentiment is my life motto.
After Eric died I spent many a moment contemplating the legacy that he had left behind. Not long after, my children started singing a popular Tim McGraw song called "Live Like You Were Dying". The words struck home for them...while other people were having to remind themselves to live like they were dying Eric just did. It was like he could do no other.
Here is the chorus...

I went sky diving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named fumanchu
and I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter
and I gave forgiveness I’d been denying
and he said someday I hope you get the chance
to live like you were dying.

After listening to this song for months I started forming the above phrase "Love deeply, Give freely". I learned so much from my years with Eric but I will say the most valuable lesson was giving freely. Giving of your time, your resources, your words of encouragement. Most in our church will tell you that the thing they miss the most about Eric is his acts of service. Everything we owned was held very loosely and given freely. There were quite a few times that Eric would bring a homeless family over for dinner. He would create work for those in need of a job. He spent countless hours spending time with those that are hard to befriend. He got on his knees and gave each little kid a hug. This was Eric's life give freely.
I so enjoyed working along side Eric although there were moments when I thought he was crazy! I see the same passion in the eyes of my children. We continue to serve and give but on a smaller scale.

One night Eric grabbed me by the leg as I was walking past him. He looked me in the eye and said "I want you to get married again if something happens to me". Of course, I told him to stop it...I could not even imagine getting married again (I wasn't suppose to imagine this while I was married!). Who would have known that a few weeks later I would find myself as a widow.
Love deeply...I so want to do be able to love someone deeply have that commitment, intimacy, and companionship. Because I learned to love Eric deeply I yearn to love deeply again. As I wait for God to bring the right man along I am learning to love Him deeply...I know I will look back on this time of my life and cherish His provision and
His teaching me to love even deeper.

*Sorry about the change in font....I can't seem to get it to change back to the normal. Ugh!


Lesa said...

I love your motto! They are great words to focus on each morning!

I recently had the privilege of hearing Lisa Harper speak. She was talking about still being single and how she has prayed for many years that God would send the man that He has for her. She said that her future husband is out there wandering around lost on his journey to find her. He just hasn't stopped to ask for directions yet....

Still keeping you in my thoughts and prayers each day!

CristyLynn said...

Heather, this is beautiful. We're praying for all of your hearts as you grow in the Lord. And we'll pray for the heart of the man that God has prepared for you, too.