Worship

Let every breath, all that I am
Never cease to worship You.

Eric use to remind us regularly that worship was a daily occurrence. It was not solely what we did on Sunday. If we lived our lives one way during the week and then took on a certain piety on Sunday than we were no better than the Pharisees. We were hypocrites. Every day is to be lived to the glory and worship of our Creator.
We corporately praise the One, True Living God on the Lord's day. It is a special day where we learn to be more like Him and then where we have the privilege of fellowship with our brothers and sisters in Christ.

I wake up to KLOVE every morning and Shout to the Lord was playing with the words above being the first I heard. There are some songs that make it past their first couple of years of being sung in the church. They become classics and this twentieth century praise song will be one of those classics that will be sung by many generations.
But, sometimes we sing a song and forget the impact of the words. Honestly, music is such a huge part of my life that I rarely sing a praise song that does not impact me to some extent. Even this song that I have sung hundreds of times still makes we weak at the knees.
The thought of mountains bowing down and seas roaring in praise to their Creator just awes me. All of my days I truly want to praise the wonders of His mighty love...I do sing for joy at the works of His hand even when I can't fathom why.
Music is an incredible gift to us as His people. And, words like these are a beautiful reminder of His majesty and our place in His kingdom.
Hum it, sing it, reflect on it...

My Jesus, my Savior
Lord there is none like You
All of my days
I want to praise the wonders of Your mighty love
My comfort, my shelter
Tower of refuge and strength
Let every breath, all that I am
Never cease to worship You

Shout to the Lord all the earth let us sing
Power and majesty, praise to the King
Mountains bow down and the seas will roar
At the sound of Your name
I sing for joy at the works of Your hand
Forever I'll love You forever I'll stand
Nothing compares to the promise I have in You

~Heather

The Art of Contentment

I Timothy 6:6-8
⁶But godliness with contentment is great gain.
⁷For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it.
⁸But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.

Probably one of the most profound lessons that I will have learned here on earth is being content. Discontentment has ruled much of my life. I was discontent while in college. I was discontent while I was first married. I was discontent with how many children we were given. I was discontent with the house He gave us, the wage He gave Eric, the clothes in my closet...you name it, I was not happy.

Basically, I wanted everything my way or no way. I was like the child who stomps her foot and says that she doesn't want any ice cream if she can't have the flavor she wants. That discontentment would rear its ugly head as jealousy and bitterness. I would covet those that had things that were better than I. I would covet those who were given the spotlight more than I. I grew bitter everytime a friend got pregnant and I didn't.

I write this and just can't believe how far the Lord has taken me. There has been some serious growing up being done around here. The proof is that in a year that I could have had some major issues with discontentment I have found my heart satisfied with where God has me. I have surrendered to His will for my life and it feels so good to obey.

There are moments though. Some I have already admitted...like not being keen on my status as a single, let alone a single mom. I had one of those moments this afternoon. As I was waking up from a nice Sunday nap I found myself incredibly lonely. I was wishing for the closeness of a man's arm around me. Just to hear someone next to me breathing deeply would be so nice. My heart cry turned into a literal cry to God to help me be satisfied with the position that He has me in right now. He answered...He always does when His children ask for help with something that He desires of them.

My journey to contentment started when we began the adoption process. There has been no other time in my life where I had to sacrifice so much. We sacrificed our time, money, energy, resources, and hearts to bring home Brown Sugar and Lil' Cowboy. During the year it took us to bring them home we became very content with what God has given us. There are few things more humbling then to see how people live in a third world country. It changes your perspective. What is truly necessary for our well-being here on earth? The passage above says food and clothing. A roof over your head or a comfortable bed to sleep in at night is not even mentioned.

Of course, there is nothing like death to remind us of where we came from and where we are going. We came into this world with not even a stitch of clothing and we will leave it as dust in the ground. Kind of humbling don't you think?
All of these worldly goods are of no value if they are not used for His glory. He gave it to us anyway and He can easily take it away. Practically speaking you have to set your mind on the fact that He is in control of all things. If He is in control of everything and He asks us to be content then the obvious is to obey. But, words and actions sometimes do not come together as easily as writing those words on paper (or typing on a computer!).

Recently I asked myself the question "If I were to lose the house, my children, or my income would I be as content?". I had a moment of panic because I realized how easy it is for me to feel secure because these things are taken care of right now. But, what if? I just have to "trust in the Lord with all my heart and lean not on my own understanding". In the same way that you have to trust when you worry about what you would do if you were in my situation.

I guess if you were to ask me how I can be content through all this I would say that it is the giving up, the surrendering your will to His. Speaking your requests out loud when you know you are struggling with being satisified with your lot in life. And, ultimately it is the power of the Holy Spirit that enables you to continue to submit and obey whatever He asks.

~Heather

Deliberate Thinking

I was re-reading my last post. And I think I could be misunderstood by what I wrote at the end of that particular blog spot. Here is what I wrote:
"That just plain makes me sad.
And, then it makes me cry.
And, then I begin to rejoice.
Rejoice in His goodness, His mercy."

I want you to know that I do not rejoice naturally. In my humanness I would rather curl up into a little ball and call it quits. I would rather the world just stop and I get off. Granted, the feelings are not as intense as they were last year but the feelings are still there. The lonliness is real. The overwhelming responsibility of taking care of this family is real.
So, rejoicing doesn't just happen. It is a commitment to seeing things through God's eyes. Rejoicing is a deliberate task...purposing to do what God asks me to do even though I do it by faith. It takes faith to rejoice because the rewards are not necessarily seen at the moment. My faith is where my hope lies. Hope that God is working at making me more like Him through my obedience. Hope that He will work all things out for my good and His glory.

Even though it takes deliberate thinking to rejoice it does seem easy right now. I am so resting in God and trusting His right hand. This is one of those times when I feel like I am floating along doing what comes next. Not much bothers me...even those little bumps in the road (they are all little compared to losing Eric).
Not all moments are like these but for the time being I am content in His plan for me. I am content living by faith and in hope quoting regularly...
Rejoice in the Lord always, again I say rejoice!
~Heather

Family Integration

A few of you asked about our church. In particular, many of you were curious about family integration and how that works in our community.
For those of you who do not know what this is let me explain.
Family integration is basically keeping the family together when worshiping at church.
This can mean so many things to so many people though.
There are churches that are tolerant of those who bring their children into the church service.
There are those who are absolutely intolerant and even have created rules to keep children from being in the service with their parents.
Then there are those of us who believe that the church service is the ideal place to take your children.
But, family integration goes a bit further still. It is all about integrating all ages. From the oldest to the youngest. This is what churches did for centuries before we decided that breaking up into age groups was a "better" idea.

We all know the cons of a fully age integrated service. You have the elderly who have a hard enough time hearing the sermon without little miss over in the corner cooing or possibly even crying. Every week I wrestle with a three year old who would rather be out playing than sitting in my lap.
But, the pros? Your children get to see you worship. My children see me praise my God. I get to worship with my kids. I think this trumps any negatives that children can bring to the sanctuary.

I am not staunch on this integration stuff though.
I know that our style of church is not for everyone. I am convinced that God has established many different churches for the many different people He has called for His purpose.
I am not against age segregated Sunday Schools either. I actually think that there are some great benefits to teaching to the level of the little ones.
What I do not like is the presumption on the part of many parents that the church is their babysitter. I have heard it said by many a mom that she "deserves" a break from her children. On the other hand, sometimes the church allows and even helps the parents abdicate their responsibility in raising their children. It is fairly clear in Scripture that parents are to teach the Word of God to their children. Dad and mom can appoint another to teach their children but all of the responsibility lies squarely on the shoulders of the parents.

So, what about youth groups? I have mixed emotions. I truly believe that the family is the best youth group that could have ever been invented. But, I had some awesome experiences in some of the youth groups that I attended. The music at one particular church was so incredible and the opportunities to minister were amazing.
We do not have a youth group but then again...we really do. We have a group of kids that congregate in the back before and after service. What do we expect? We do the same! We as adults tend to congregate with our own peers...you rarely see a man or woman down on the floor playing with the three year olds! We have worked hard to get this group of teens to help out in different ways. Many of them will help with the little ones or in the kitchen.
In some sense, we can talk all we want about what we think church should look like but the reality ends up looking a little different. And, that is okay.
When all is said and done, hearing the Word of God preached accurately is much more important than whether or not your children are in Children's church or sitting by your side.
I would rather fellowship in a church that has love for one another and a vibrant youth group than fellowship with a body of believers who were stagnant in their faith and staunchly opposed to Sunday schools.
Oh, and by the way, one of the benefits of not having a Sunday school program? No more Sunday school papers to throw away!
~Heather